My cousin's daughter died at age 5 from a brain tumor. My aunt - my father's youngest sister died of suicide when I was 21. I thought about death when I was a teen and in my early twenties.

My father died on my 55th birthday he was 86 and died of a lung disorder. Despite my efforts to stave off his poor breathing (as a healer) he passed and visited me right after the death of his body and nine months later.

My mom passed at 97 from dementia, I was 63 years old. My sister tried to care for my mother at her home after my father passed. My mom was depressed - I think by the kind of care she received from my sister. My sister reported that my mom "perked-up" when my sister told her she was going into a home for people with memory disorders.

After the grief settled I became my own person in toto.